Friday, April 10, 2009

what stresses me out

Today I had an appointment at my little part time job. While I was there I talked with my boss about possibly changing how I get paid for rentals or changing how much I see of the restocking fee. So my boss said that we couldn't change the amount I get paid but if I wanted to stay and work a couple hours cleaning in the storage areas that I could. I said that I couldn't stay any longer today explaining about my busy week. Rental on Monday, Babysit on Tuesday, Matinee on Wednesday, errands on Thursday and Rental on Friday.
My boss said that he could tell I had baby sat because I had seemed stressed. Meaning that baby sitting stresses me out. I don't actually think this is the case. I think that not being able to write stresses me out. Running around and doing a bunch of other things that aren't writing leaves me with very little time to write. So instead I am thinking about stories I have written or story ideas I have in my head. I get stressed because I think about how I am not working on my writing.
In addition to getting stressed I get frustrated because I know that I should be setting side the time to write and not saying yes to everything. I am working on not being frustrated with myself when I chose to do something other than writing. Being frustrated means that I come back to my writing and write about being mad at myself for letting other things get in the way of writing.
I feel like it is better to be a little busy now and to take these opportunities to make a little extra money right now in hopes that I won't have to work two jobs at the same time and really steal time away from my writing.
I have been working on a story which I have been writing in a notebook for now until I have the time to sit and write at my desk on my computer. It is going really well and is really fun to write.
When I've written my NaNoWriMo novels in the past I have just written and not really worried about revising and structure. This time around I am taking my time and really thinking about chapter and timeline and plot.

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